Q. Why do elephants drink?
A. To forget....
A. To forget....
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T
Tania Admin
Re: Jokes and Funnies
I just had to share this one, I haven't laughed that hard in ages!
I just had to share this one, I haven't laughed that hard in ages!
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Driver Jard
If you understand basic chemistry then you will know the following scientific fact that...
According to chemistry ALCOHOL is a SOLUTION!
According to chemistry ALCOHOL is a SOLUTION!
H
HoneyHoneyHoney
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Nikki.Anderson
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Tania Admin
Lmao, there are people that really do this, that makes it all the more funny.
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T
Tania Admin
Re: Jokes and Funnies
Not a good choice in clothing here lol
Not a good choice in clothing here lol
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Re: Jokes and Funnies
Hello ppls i started this thread in 2004 wow cant believe its still going
i don't have a joke today but i have a riddle..... lets see who gets it right
I have four wings but can't fly
i never laugh and never cry
on the same spot i'm always found, toiling away
with little sound....
What am i??
hopefully someone gets it right
thanks Lana
Hello ppls i started this thread in 2004 wow cant believe its still going
i don't have a joke today but i have a riddle..... lets see who gets it right
I have four wings but can't fly
i never laugh and never cry
on the same spot i'm always found, toiling away
with little sound....
What am i??
hopefully someone gets it right
thanks Lana
Re: Jokes and Funnies
oh my gosh no one answered
bummer
well the answer was WINDMILL
Hello ppls i started this thread in 2004 wow cant believe its still going
i don't have a joke today but i have a riddle..... lets see who gets it right
I have four wings but can't fly
i never laugh and never cry
on the same spot i'm always found, toiling away
with little sound....
What am i??
hopefully someone gets it right
thanks Lana
oh my gosh no one answered
bummerwell the answer was WINDMILL
S
Stubbies
Re: Jokes and Funnies
The world economy explained with two cows...
SOCIALISM You have 2 cows. You give one to your neighbour.
COMMUNISM You have 2 cows The State takes both and gives you some milk.
FASCISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk.
BUREAUCRATISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other and then throws the milk away.
TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.
VENTURE CAPITALISM You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.
AN AMERICAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has died.
A FRENCH CORPORATION You have two cows. You go on strike, organize a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.
AN ITALIAN CORPORATION You have two cows, but you do not know where they are. You decide to have lunch.
A SWISS CORPORATION You have 5,000 cows. None of them belong to you. You charge the owners for storing them.
A CHINESE CORPORATION You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim that you have full employment and high bovine productivity. You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.
AN INDIAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You worship them.
A BRITISH CORPORATION You have two cows. Both are mad.
AN IRAQI CORPORATION Everyone thinks you have lots of cows. You tell them that you have none. Nobody believes you, so they bomb the crap out of you and invade your country. You still have no cows but at least you are now a Democracy.
AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION You have two cows. Business seems pretty good. You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.
A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION You have two cows. The one on the left looks very attractive.
A GREEK CORPORATION You have two cows borrowed from French and German banks. You eat both of them. The banks call to collect their milk, but you cannot deliver so you call the IMF. The IMF loans you two cows. You eat both of them. The banks and the IMF call to collect their cows/milk. You are out getting a haircut.
AN IRISH CORPORATION You have two cows. One of them's a horse.
The world economy explained with two cows...
SOCIALISM You have 2 cows. You give one to your neighbour.
COMMUNISM You have 2 cows The State takes both and gives you some milk.
FASCISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk.
BUREAUCRATISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other and then throws the milk away.
TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.
VENTURE CAPITALISM You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.
AN AMERICAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has died.
A FRENCH CORPORATION You have two cows. You go on strike, organize a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.
AN ITALIAN CORPORATION You have two cows, but you do not know where they are. You decide to have lunch.
A SWISS CORPORATION You have 5,000 cows. None of them belong to you. You charge the owners for storing them.
A CHINESE CORPORATION You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim that you have full employment and high bovine productivity. You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.
AN INDIAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You worship them.
A BRITISH CORPORATION You have two cows. Both are mad.
AN IRAQI CORPORATION Everyone thinks you have lots of cows. You tell them that you have none. Nobody believes you, so they bomb the crap out of you and invade your country. You still have no cows but at least you are now a Democracy.
AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION You have two cows. Business seems pretty good. You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.
A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION You have two cows. The one on the left looks very attractive.
A GREEK CORPORATION You have two cows borrowed from French and German banks. You eat both of them. The banks call to collect their milk, but you cannot deliver so you call the IMF. The IMF loans you two cows. You eat both of them. The banks and the IMF call to collect their cows/milk. You are out getting a haircut.
AN IRISH CORPORATION You have two cows. One of them's a horse.
S
Stubbies
View attachment 13425 Just an image from the collection on my laptop...
Re: Jokes and Funnies
A construction worker came home just in time to find his wife in bed with another man. So he dragged the man down the stairs to the garage and put his penis in a vise. He secured it tightly, super glued it shut, and removed the handle. Then he picked up a hacksaw. The man, terrified, screamed, "Stop! Stop! You're not going to..to..Cut it off, are you?" The husband said, with a horrible gleam of revenge in his eye, "Nope. You are. I'm going to set the garage on fire
lana:laughing4
A construction worker came home just in time to find his wife in bed with another man. So he dragged the man down the stairs to the garage and put his penis in a vise. He secured it tightly, super glued it shut, and removed the handle. Then he picked up a hacksaw. The man, terrified, screamed, "Stop! Stop! You're not going to..to..Cut it off, are you?" The husband said, with a horrible gleam of revenge in his eye, "Nope. You are. I'm going to set the garage on fire
lana:laughing4
Re: Jokes and Funnies
A young couple took their two-year-old son to the doctor. With some hesitation, they explained that, although their little angel appeared to be in good health, they were concerned about his rather small penis. After examining the child, the doctor confidently declared, "Just feed him pancakes. That should solve the problem." The next morning, when the boy arrived at breakfast, there was a large stack of warm pancakes in the middle of the table. "Gee, mom," he exclaimed. "For me?" "Just take two," his mother replied. "The rest are for your father
lana :laughing4
A young couple took their two-year-old son to the doctor. With some hesitation, they explained that, although their little angel appeared to be in good health, they were concerned about his rather small penis. After examining the child, the doctor confidently declared, "Just feed him pancakes. That should solve the problem." The next morning, when the boy arrived at breakfast, there was a large stack of warm pancakes in the middle of the table. "Gee, mom," he exclaimed. "For me?" "Just take two," his mother replied. "The rest are for your father
lana :laughing4
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Stubbies
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S
Stubbies
View attachment 13433 View attachment 13434
My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli. He was pulled in by a strong currant.
My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli. He was pulled in by a strong currant.
T
Tania Admin
I couldn't stop laughing,,,epic fail.....
View attachment 13451
Though I have no doubt some will find this quite sexy
View attachment 13451
Though I have no doubt some will find this quite sexy
T
Tania Admin
Re: HaHa...
I pranced into the mens room not long ago. It's next to a meeting room and there's a meeting going on, the meeting room door was opened. I was doing my part of releasing much needed liquid into the sewer system then the there's a wrath of mad greenhouse gas mixture came out from my blowhole with a vengeance. It's uncontrollable to say the least. I walked out of there relieved and pretended nothing happened.
I pranced into the mens room not long ago. It's next to a meeting room and there's a meeting going on, the meeting room door was opened. I was doing my part of releasing much needed liquid into the sewer system then the there's a wrath of mad greenhouse gas mixture came out from my blowhole with a vengeance. It's uncontrollable to say the least. I walked out of there relieved and pretended nothing happened.
T
Tania Admin
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