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Is it called cheating??

of course its cheating...its doing something behind the woman you loves back....it is deceitful...now if she was in on it...wouldnt that be better!!
 
It's definitely cheating, but I can understand why people do it. They love their partners and don't want to jeopardize their relationships, but they need that extra sexual satisfaction. And they justify it by sleeping with w/l's, where there is no other connection other than sexual.
 
Yes its cheating but if you want to do something so bad and you think your partner wont have a bar of it, then talk about it with them and tell them how big a fantasy it is to you, who knows they might surprise you and want to try it too?
 
i agree with that diane and i think it is more exciting when you talk and carry out a fantasy with you partner. we are our next fix. PM if you are interested in a FFM.
 
I tihnk Diane hit the nail on the head. I know someone whose wife lets them see WLs. She would rather that than have him 'cheat' on her.

Im not saying its right, but it works for them
 
Dic(k)tionary definition:-
"To deceive or practice decit, esp for one's own gain; trick or swindle (someone).
to be sexually unfaithful to (one's wife, husband or lover)"

If the partner is aware then ,of course, it is not cheating. If the partner is unaware then decit is involved.

Many people will rationalise their motives but when all is said and done, more is done than said (which means talking to your partner about problems with your sex life first).
 
Yeah, if you are not comfortable telling your partner then its obvious that you know you are doing something that you feel is wrong for your relationship so it then becomes 'cheating'
 
its only cheating if you actively try to find it,but if it walks through the door....
 
No-one has mentioned the money aspect yet so I will throw it into the ring.

If you ran joint finances and either partner took $300+ and spent on him or her self without asking the other I bet there would be trouble in the home.

A man taking the money and blowing it on an hour's fun with a W.L. is the same thing as the lady of the partnership blowing it on a fancy hat she only wears once.

If you are both squillionaires I suppose it would not be a big deal but for average working stiffs it is a fair bit of money.
 
I'm sort of with Buddy on this one. A lot of people taking indignant moral stance on this without considering just what cheating might be. Is it having sex outside of a relationship, or does the mere thought of it constitute a cheat? Can you imagine yourself walking down the street, those of you with a fine moral conscience, and turning to your partner every 10 metres and saying "gees honey, I could do with a bit of that". Answer: cheating is when you know you've crossed a line. But who am I to judge, I cheat all the time. (:>
 
Yes it's is cheating but what does one do when you have try everything and your partner refuses and doesn't give you what u desire soo badly. I mean, if your constantly horny but your partner doesn't allow you to touch her or is in the mood. what do u do?
 
Personally I feel that this is cheating.

It happened to me in what I thought was a loving, healthy, sexy relationship. This ended as soon as I found out about what he'd done.

I agree with Strum - no matter how you clothe it, cheating is cheating, deceitful and hurtful.
 
To throw a spanner in the works, how many escorts / strippers have partners who dont know what they do??

I have a friend who works in a well known establishment and her BF has no idea and she would definitely be upset if he cheated on her.
 
yes i think it's cheating if you are keeping something from your partner,
 
billybones said:
What`s my view on this??
Being with someone else apart from your partner is cheating but what if you had a certain fantasy that you knew full well that the other person in your relationship wouldn`t agree with??

Would it not be better to have someone help you with this then have you resent your partner for never allowing you to fulfill this fantasy??

Like a white lie... as long as it never interfered or stopped you loving your partner is there a harm??
Click to expand...

What you are suggesting is just selfish and concerns your feelings and not your partners. If you are trying to convince yourself that it's ok then put yourself in your partners shoes and if you can honestly say that you don't care then you don't really care about your partner so, be honest with her and break the relationship off and stop thinking of yourself.
 
WRXXR said:
To throw a spanner in the works, how many escorts / strippers have partners who dont know what they do??

I have a friend who works in a well known establishment and her BF has no idea and she would definitely be upset if he cheated on her.
Click to expand...

But none of what you say makes it right does it ?? Everything comes down to whether you care about your partner the way you would expect him/her to care about you.
 
ok...

Dont know if this has been answered before...but...

What if your partner discusses this with you...you are in a long distance relationship...you say that you are not comfortable with it...and one day she calls you up and tells you..that she went over to this guys house and had sex...purely for physical reasons....

Isnt that cheating? Here the person has been upfront...but both parties were not comfortable...still one goes ahead and does it...personal experience...some hard lessons learnt...the bottom line...when you cannot be unfaithful..and the other person can be...without even batting an eyelid...i think the writing is on the wall...no matter how much you may try and run from the facts...

In my humble opinion...if you are with someone...(at least if i am)...i cannot love someone only emotionally and not physically..its two sides of the same coin...you cannot say...ok i will only use this one side of the coin and not the other...

We have to face ourselves...face the facts...if you are thinking of being with someone else so bad that you are actually going out there...your relationship is not working for you...
 
If you are doing anything wrong then, you are not cheating at all. If you are thinking like this then, you should discuss with your partner because in a relationship everything should be clear.
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Link is broken,so has been taken down
 
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Maybe its just me but I dont even see how it is a question? Ofcorse it is cheating, if it wasnt then you would have no problems telling your wife would you :)

And if your wife did know, and she didnt care, then it isnt cheating I guess.
 
Yes, but if theres no emotion or anything just a once off it shouldnt even raise a eyebrow depending on the partner of course.
 
I think this is a great thread.
I agree with the OP that if it's something you feel you need to hide then it's cheating. Although I have discussed WL with my husband before and although I would be upset that he felt he could not ask me to fulfill his needs (which would have to be wayyy out as I'm the one with the higher libido) I would prefer him see a WL than some chick from work or the pub etc.
If it's just sex that you need then yes, pay a professional. But don't expect me to not have trust issues or not feel like I need to end the marraige due to some girl that you may be able to form emotional attachment to.
 
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