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Past partners or experience

H

Hardwood

When, if ever is it appropriate to talk to your new partner about your past partners or experiences?????:love3:
 
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D

DRUMMER

My Opinion only.
Stay away from that one. Unless you have a partner that gets off on your past experiences and actualy extends you an invitation to reveal. I can say that I have had a partner that loved to here what I used to get up to with past partners and she would get turned on. It was a bit uncompfortable at first But she was bi and we shared an open relationship. Other than that it can turn nasty. Most of us on this forum are compfortable within their own self and in touch with their own sexuality. As long as the discussions are just experiences and not comparrisons it may be safe, but only when invited. Each to their own.

All the best.
 
F

fisherman33

Gotta agree with Drummer, unless they are truely interested and asking, don't go there...
 
W

WRXXR

Best not to i've found. Just leave it in the past really. The "how many" question is even pushing it if you ask me.

9 times out of 10 it always end's up in comparisons which is never healthy.
 

Fudd

Full Member
Foundation Member
Points
5
...this is another lose/lose scenario....just like when your partner/spouse asks if "....her bum looks big...." when trying on a new outfit..... :)
 

Rochelle

Forum & Langtrees.com Administrator
Staff member
Legend Member
Points
385
Agreed guys......no need to talk about the past. So much better to look forward and embrace the future. I have always been careful with talking about my former partners and only react when asked directly. And the same the other way round......why would I want to know about my partner's former relation ships. But to be honest......the longer you are with a person the more stories are revealed anyway.......kind of happens automatically and I think that's the best way to let it happen.
R.xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
PS: enough for today....better get ready for work :notworthy
Everybody an awesome Friday night xxxxxxx
 
G

Gizelle

is never a good idea to start a new relationship with questions about your past or how many partners you had before because you will never be happy with the answer especially if you are comparing her or him with your last partner :love10::love10:
 

dickpot

Silver Member
Points
0
unles you have a very open relationship i would keep past conquests for your private thoroughts
 
F

Farm Boy

No.................................................................................................
 
F

FateDecided

Unless you both get off on hearing about the others' previous partners, better to skip that discussion. It rarely goes anywhere good.
 
T

TessInBrisbane

Yup...I'd be inclined to skip that conversation! Isn't likely to end well ;)

Tess xx
tessinbrisbane.com
 
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T

TallTara

i agree, the past should be left behind and only using the past for referencing your present actions. You learn from your past what to do and what not to. This should be a hot topic between partners, although maybe between friends.
 

Rochelle

Forum & Langtrees.com Administrator
Staff member
Legend Member
Points
385
Hi happytimes,
I think it is more the other way round. If I can talk about an ex (especially with a new partner) then I am over the ex. If I can't talk about the ex because I am still blocked by pain/memories then there is still work to do and certainly NO way to make it a topic with the new partner.
However I wonder sometimes why it is such a sensitive point.......you think we should grow out of it and getting more secure in our own personalities. (just for the record.....I am not over the sensitivity myself.....just wondering). Is it only about jealousy, comparison, loss, owner ship etc or is there more behind it?
LOL......haven't been on here for 2 days and getting far too philosophical for this time of the day.
R.xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
 
C

Cathy/Diane87

Me and my partner are straight up with our pasts it saves any secrets from getting revealed later but i have to say normally i couldn't do that but with him it's different were both straight up well atleast as far as i know. The hardest thing is when the past comes back thats the hard part.
 
Z

zandalee

Hell no might all be ok to start with but the more serious u get the more possessive i find my men get iv done it once regretted it and i learn from my mistakes
 
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