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How do you feel about the word gay?

Dakota Cameron

Dakota Cameron

Gold Member
I am referring to the comment of: "that is so gay" to describe sexuality.

So; to be entirely honest, I hate it. I used to say all the time to myself, until I started to understand what it actually means. Using the statement to describe a negative event or situation can only mean (to me) that being "gay" is a negative thing.

I understand that majority of people who say it aren't using it in a homophobic way and it becomes a bit of a habit. I do think though that if we do not start pointing it out to others and thinking before we speak, it will continue to be used.

For young LGBTs, hearing this negativity constantly can have a truly negative constantly can have a truly negative affect on their mental well-being. Young LGBT people are constantly bombarded by negativity in the media surrounding homosexuality and I feel as though these seemingly small amounts of negativity can add to the already difficult times they already face (especially teens at school). On a personal level, I do feel a bit of shame and sadness within myself every time I hear somebody say that in front of me.

In the general community you'll hear people jumping down another person's throat for uttering the words: "that is so retarded" The same should be done for the comment of 'that is so retarded'. The same should be done for the comment: "That is so gay". In both instances, even if no harm is actually intended by the person, the comment is degrading already marginalized people.

I don't think that your a bad person or that you should feel guilty for saying it. It has become a common phrase in our community and a habit for many people. But I do think that it's important for everyone to think about the ramifications of their words before speaking, no matter who it is referring to. :)
 
How do I feel about its use....don't use it myself and never have. Grew up in period when far worse passed as normal discourse so maybe I'm desensitised. In my experience however "gay" is used by people with either a limited vocabulary or are simply too lazy to use a far more appropriate word.

Do I hate the use of the word....probably not. I reserve the emotion of hate for many other words; physical abuse, torture, rape, murder, genocide, starvation etc. They are the words that really fire me up.
Cheers
 
gaytime-628.jpg


And you gotta hate this too...right? Streets got a lot to answer for, and no one has taken them to court? hmmm...

If being gay is a "positive" thing, would it be offensive? Human beings being human beings always quick to jump and pounce on things they don't know and give it a bad name.

Guilty I was, used it I had several occasions and some many times. Sorry I must say, sensitive as I need be.
 
I would've liked to see more comments from any gay or bisexual members as I am unsure as to how offended they themselves would be. I've heard it used before now by some gay people and have also used it myself in "mixed" company with nary any offence being taken.
Surely one would need to consider the context in which a phrase (any phrase) is delivered/used rather than dismissing all uses of said phrase out-of-hand.
I can call friends effing bastards and remain friends; same words delivered differently, or to different group, may result in my early demise.

Deep down we're probably all at least a little bit gay.
 
I get very distressed whenever people (almost always women) complain about a place or event being a 'sausage fest'. Does that mean there's something wrong with having a sausage?? :oops:
 
XLNC said:
I get very distressed whenever people (almost always women) complain about a place or event being a 'sausage fest'. Does that mean there's something wrong with having a sausage?? :oops:
Click to expand...
One of the women's name must be Wilma.
"When you're with the Flintstones...gay old time. WILMA!!"
 
I have never thought of this before Dakota, it is a great topic to bring up. I must admit that I have said it before. I don't think that it is said without any negative thinking most of the time, I think people are just unaware of what they are saying, because it is used so commonly.

Such as the word 'nigger', African Americans use it all the time towards each other, however that word was created to be negative towards African Americans. But they don't think that there is anything wrong with it.
 
homer said:
gaytime-628.jpg


And you gotta hate this too...right? Streets got a lot to answer for, and no one has taken them to court? hmmm...

If being gay is a "positive" thing, would it be offensive? Human beings being human beings always quick to jump and pounce on things they don't know and give it a bad name.

Guilty I was, used it I had several occasions and some many times. Sorry I must say, sensitive as I need be.
Click to expand...

I remember reading years ago that with the golden gaytime which has been around since gay meant happy, that the company Streets, we're going to change its name at the time when Gay was taken on by the LGBT community. But to their surprise, they received so much positive feedback from the Gay community to keep the name that they did. I love standing at the counter of the cafe with my work associates and boss and when they say, are you having a coffee? I say, I feel like having a Gaytime!! Lol!!!
 
Dakota Cameron said:
I am referring to the comment of: "that is so gay" to describe sexuality.

So; to be entirely honest, I hate it. I used to say all the time to myself, until I started to understand what it actually means. Using the statement to describe a negative event or situation can only mean (to me) that being "gay" is a negative thing.

I understand that majority of people who say it aren't using it in a homophobic way and it becomes a bit of a habit. I do think though that if we do not start pointing it out to others and thinking before we speak, it will continue to be used.

For young LGBTs, hearing this negativity constantly can have a truly negative constantly can have a truly negative affect on their mental well-being. Young LGBT people are constantly bombarded by negativity in the media surrounding homosexuality and I feel as though these seemingly small amounts of negativity can add to the already difficult times they already face (especially teens at school). On a personal level, I do feel a bit of shame and sadness within myself every time I hear somebody say that in front of me.

In the general community you'll hear people jumping down another person's throat for uttering the words: "that is so retarded" The same should be done for the comment of 'that is so retarded'. The same should be done for the comment: "That is so gay". In both instances, even if no harm is actually intended by the person, the comment is degrading already marginalized people.

I don't think that your a bad person or that you should feel guilty for saying it. It has become a common phrase in our community and a habit for many people. But I do think that it's important for everyone to think about the ramifications of their words before speaking, no matter who it is referring to. :)
Click to expand...
These days, this word is used so casually its like children saying............you smell.....
 
homer said:
gaytime-628.jpg


And you gotta hate this too...right? Streets got a lot to answer for, and no one has taken them to court? hmmm...

If being gay is a "positive" thing, would it be offensive? Human beings being human beings always quick to jump and pounce on things they don't know and give it a bad name.

Guilty I was, used it I had several occasions and some many times. Sorry I must say, sensitive as I need be.
Click to expand...
I once had a mentor that said he has to hide and eat those in the 70's when he was a child so his friends won't give him shit lol.
 
I know finding new truly encompassing words to fit must be hard But to me and only me I always thought Gay was a silly term to use to lump such a disparate group of people into
 
XLNC said:
I get very distressed whenever people (almost always women) complain about a place or event being a 'sausage fest'. Does that mean there's something wrong with having a sausage?? :oops:
Click to expand...


You see a room full of men versus a room full of women, no one thinks anything sexually about a room full of women, whereby a room full of men have connotations of sexual overtones such as Sausage Fest, gay time, etc etc.... society is to blame for this..... Having a sausage in 2016 is no longer what it used to be back in say the 1970's.....
 
This straight from Wikipedia.

Now we are more confused than ever. Is it wrong, is it right, is it OK.

Maybe it has more to do with the meaning you learned when you learned the word as a child.
Should we be criticizing people for using a word they understand as having a completely innocent meaning?

Gay is a term that primarily refers to a homosexual person or the trait of being homosexual. The term was originally used to refer to feelings of being "carefree", "happy", or "bright and showy".

The term's use as a reference to homosexuality may date as early as the late 19th century, but its use gradually increased in the 20th century.[1] In modern English, gay has come to be used as an adjective, and as a noun, referring to the people, especially to gay males, and the practices and cultures associated with homosexuality. By the end of the 20th century, the word gay was recommended by major LGBT groups and style guides to describe people attracted to members of the same sex.[2][3]

At about the same time, a new, pejorative use became prevalent in some parts of the world. In the Anglosphere, this connotation, among younger speakers, has a meaning ranging from derision (e.g., equivalent to rubbish or stupid) to a light-hearted mockery or ridicule (e.g., equivalent to weak, unmanly, or lame). In this use, the word rarely means "homosexual", as it is often used, for example, to refer to an inanimate object or abstract concept of which one disapproves. The extent to which these usages still retain connotations of homosexuality has been debated and harshly criticized.
 
Many words have been sexualised to I mean ask a person of my mothers vintage which is nigh on95 and she will say if asked what is a Fanny? It is a ladys name or a slang term for said ladies bottom

I think you still can buy fanny packs cant you ?
 
Happy2 said:
Many words have been sexualised to I mean ask a person of my mothers vintage which is nigh on95 and she will say if asked what is a Fanny? It is a ladys name or a slang term for said ladies bottom

I think you still can buy fanny packs cant you ?
Click to expand...

I think Fanny is more an American term for a bum, hence fanny pack translates to Bumbag in England and Australia.
 
True But A few of the older people I mean Real old even older than you Spikey Have referred to the bum as fanny and as a old English Christian name
I do grant they were English born So it may well vary to our own version
 
Happy2 said:
True But A few of the older people I mean Real old even older than you Spikey Have referred to the bum as fanny and as a old English Christian name
I do grant they were English born So it may well vary to our own version
Click to expand...

Yes, Fanny is an older English Christian name for a woman. I guess that is why fanny is never used to describe someone's bum in England or Australia (maybe sometimes in Australia, as some Australians seem to be adopting Americanisms; which is a pity)
 
Dallas said:
I remember reading years ago that with the golden gaytime which has been around since gay meant happy, that the company Streets, we're going to change its name at the time when Gay was taken on by the LGBT community. But to their surprise, they received so much positive feedback from the Gay community to keep the name that they did. I love standing at the counter of the cafe with my work associates and boss and when they say, are you having a coffee? I say, I feel like having a Gaytime!! Lol!!!
Click to expand...

Try saying that in a LGBT community they would love you to death...lol oh you can try swanbourne for starters.
 
Treat others as you would like to be treated. My Mum always taught me that when you have nothing nice to say dont say anything. these two statements i feel apply here.
 
Dakota Cameron said:
I am referring to the comment of: "that is so gay" to describe sexuality.

So; to be entirely honest, I hate it. I used to say all the time to myself, until I started to understand what it actually means. Using the statement to describe a negative event or situation can only mean (to me) that being "gay" is a negative thing.

I understand that majority of people who say it aren't using it in a homophobic way and it becomes a bit of a habit. I do think though that if we do not start pointing it out to others and thinking before we speak, it will continue to be used.

For young LGBTs, hearing this negativity constantly can have a truly negative constantly can have a truly negative affect on their mental well-being. Young LGBT people are constantly bombarded by negativity in the media surrounding homosexuality and I feel as though these seemingly small amounts of negativity can add to the already difficult times they already face (especially teens at school). On a personal level, I do feel a bit of shame and sadness within myself every time I hear somebody say that in front of me.

In the general community you'll hear people jumping down another person's throat for uttering the words: "that is so retarded" The same should be done for the comment of 'that is so retarded'. The same should be done for the comment: "That is so gay". In both instances, even if no harm is actually intended by the person, the comment is degrading already marginalized people.

I don't think that your a bad person or that you should feel guilty for saying it. It has become a common phrase in our community and a habit for many people. But I do think that it's important for everyone to think about the ramifications of their words before speaking, no matter who it is referring to. :)
Click to expand...


I think it's a totally different kettle of fish, personally!

I mean Ass can mean donkey or butt

Match can mean flame lighter or a perfect set..

I think "that's so gay" is another totally different use of the word gay just like when people use the word 'gay' in place of 'happy'.

It's just homonyms, homonyms and more homonyms imo.
 
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