Not every underwear sale has a smelly ending. Isn't it amazing? You can take the conventional sales route and bang on the front door of an underwear auction house all day long and you won't get a single bite. But as soon as you adopt a pattern of behaviour and position your dull smelly undies at the optimal eye level, all of a sudden everyone wants to know when is the auction. It really is a sign of just how polarized people have become. Nevertheless, congrats! Good work I say. Interest was a little slow on the uptake, but thanks to some clever marketing, my undies have now caught the eye of a serious syndicate. The soiled undies were so unique, that once the syndicate recognised their true value, they even gave them an airing on the 6'O clock news. Who was that sales agent you ask? I don't know, I've never seen him before, but by crickey, he's one hell of a sales agent and I can't wait to commission him yet again. It took a little while, but at this rate i'm confident my wardrobe will be empty in no time at all and I'll be cuing up as Wallmart's executive buyer, for a brand new batch of brightly coloured Bonds. Made in the Philipines, of course! In the meantime, I guess I'll just have to keep inventing clever ways to impart the good news.
