What should come first??

billybones

Thrillseeker
Legend Member
Points
7
Had a late night talk with a work mate last night and he asked me a question I`ld like to here some views on...

What should come first??
Should you concentrate on establishing a career or a family?
 
W

WRXXXR

A career. Well not neccesarily a "career" but you should get yourself in a financially stable and secure position before you plan to have kids. I'm led to believe kids are expensive so I can't see how living week to week is beneficial to their upbringing.

If its unplanned then I dunno really. I guess you just make do.
 

bushbabe

Gold Member
Points
0
A career. Well not neccesarily a "career" but you should get yourself in a financially stable and secure position before you plan to have kids. I'm led to believe kids are expensive so I can't see how living week to week is beneficial to their upbringing.

If its unplanned then I dunno really. I guess you just make do.

Agreed...BUT, if you meet the right partner, then don't hold back. If you are already married, then it wouldn't hurt for both of you to get established financially before having kids. Children are a real joy, but they are quite expensive, especially when they get to school age.

There is another thing to consider also, such as the girls age..... as they definitely have a child bearing clock and obviously what sort of money you are pulling in, without the help of the spouse.

Can become a real mind/mine field. Its not easy and we normally go in Blind.

Good luck
 

aDel_

Gold Member
Points
0
my thoughts are i wont ever have babies unless i can care for them in all ways eg love care and be able to afford things for them to make life as comfy as possible. i think its unfair to bring into this world another being if you cant afford to provide for yourself. plus id not want to bring a baby into this world on my own. my best friend was single with two kids and i saw how much she struggled financially with it. worked her arse off to provide the best life for them. thankfully she has found her soul mate and they are in love and doing it as a family as he has two kids himself. theres nothing wrong with being a single parent i just dont think id handle it well.
plus its only fair that two ppl created the baby then both ppl help provide and raise said baby...
we all take different walks in life and as long as ur happy with where ur going i dont really think it matters in the end...
 
J

JasRob

I think you have to establish a career first before having a family. Once you have a stable job you will be able to cope with the finances that your family will be needing. Have to secure your future first because having kids is really a great responsibility, financially...
 

Master Yoda

“Your path you must decide.”
Legend Member
Points
56
Had a late night talk with a work mate last night and he asked me a question I`ld like to here some views on...

What should come first??
Should you concentrate on establishing a career or a family?


What ever is more suitable to one at the time according to the situation I guess :)
 
A

Alecia the Foxx

I suppose if we are talking "shoulds" then it would be a career. But lets face it, most of us were not planned; if we were we just plain wouldn't be here. So I think it's a moot point really.
 
P

Perth boy

You know thire is to sides of this one.

In my first marrage I was very young. Had 2 kids but had nothing. After all expenses didnt have money for even a beer with a mate as kids are so expensive. If we waited a while and got a career life would have been easier and we may have still been married (ok proberly not)

With wife number 2 we were a lot older, more with it and both had a good career. A few years later had a kid together and life was so much better and easier because now I did have a bit of money for a beer or two with my mates.

Now with wife number 3 Oh hang on that hasnt happend yet.

So I have done both and waiting to you are a bit older and have a career is far better. Its not just the money its your mind as well.

BB are you planing on a wife and kids lol
 
T

Tania Admin

Agreed...BUT, if you meet the right partner, then don't hold back. If you are already married, then it wouldn't hurt for both of you to get established financially before having kids. Children are a real joy, but they are quite expensive, especially when they get to school age.

There is another thing to consider also, such as the girls age..... as they definitely have a child bearing clock and obviously what sort of money you are pulling in, without the help of the spouse.

Can become a real mind/mine field. Its not easy and we normally go in Blind.

Good luck

I'm with you 100% on this one Bushbabe....
 
Last edited by a moderator:

Rochelle

Forum & Langtrees.com Administrator
Staff member
Legend Member
Points
183
Ahhhh modern times. I think it goes more and more in the direction of career first. Kids nowadays are more a financial decision. Can't blame them. To raise kids with no money can't be fun. Plus modern medicine enables women to have kids later in life.
Brave new world.

R.xxxxxxxxx
 
W

WRXXXR

And to boot, everyone I know who's having kids at the moment (mid to late 20's) have all been planning it. Over about 10-12 couples there hasn't been one accident. Suppose these days birth control is plentiful, cheap and very successful
 

Fudd

Full Member
Foundation Member
Points
5
....I'm still wondering if it was the chicken or the egg......lol... :)
 

Rochelle

Forum & Langtrees.com Administrator
Staff member
Legend Member
Points
183
And to boot, everyone I know who's having kids at the moment (mid to late 20's) have all been planning it. Over about 10-12 couples there hasn't been one accident. Suppose these days birth control is plentiful, cheap and very successful
OMG....thinking about it and asking the right questions.......lol even I was planned (no accident there......hmmmmmm) and that was many many moons ago.

R.xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
 
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