Happy2
Legend Member
- Points
- 18
Click clik clik Cliiiick
you have just upset a hottentot by the sound of it Barbosa ;D
How many languages can you speak?
- Thread starter billybones
- Start date
Click clik clik Cliiiick
you have just upset a hottentot by the sound of it Barbosa ;D
T
Tania Admin
I went to a multi-cultural school so I can swear in lots of languages. I studied, Chinese, Jugoslav and German at school. Unfortunatley I can't speak any of them fluently though 
Might sound a little odd, but I have a fascination with Latin, it's the reader in me.
Might sound a little odd, but I have a fascination with Latin, it's the reader in me.
F
Farm Boy
Be careful what you which for Sao26.2
![Caning-007[1].jpg](https://www.talkinsex.com/data/attachments/4/4748-16fa9c4b8b2f903e78cf23d5504a0e7c.jpg "Caning-007[1].jpg")
In France this is known as The English Sin
In France this is known as The English Sin
- Points
- 0
Hi RedJacqui, aren't they the same? Language, sex, sex , language. lol...
- Points
- 0
I speak Spanish Italian and English , i m working out to improve my English but I think in this days you need as well a good skill of writing in every language especially in this website
I so frustrating when i want say something i need to find the right words and put it together in the right way
You are really lucky !!! English is the most spoken language !!!
I so frustrating when i want say something i need to find the right words and put it together in the right way
You are really lucky !!! English is the most spoken language !!!
- Points
- 1,393
Ahoy Bro H2;- Ohhhhhh Myyyyy Italian`s and there english;- Lucky for meeeee thy can`t speak Pirate;- but;- Damm they know how to eat and there wine is so fine.
Cheers and Pass the rum
Cheers and Pass the rum
Barbosa
Gold Member
- Points
- 0
Aye;- Tose Italian Woman, what wonders they beeeeeeee ;- ther language is of Passion
C
Contrarian
And oldie but a goody!
The Italian tourist in Malta.
One a day I'm gonna to Malta to big a hotel. In a morning I got down to eat a breakfast. I tell a waitress: "I wanna two pieces of toast."
She brings me only one piece.
I tell her: "I wanna two piece."
She says: "Go to the toilet."
I say: "You don't understand? I wanna two piece in my plate."
She says: "You better no piss in a plate, you son of a bitch!"
I don't even know the lady and she call me son of a bitch.
Later.
I go to eat to a bigger restaurant. The waitress brings me the spoon, the knife but no fork. I tell her: "I wanna the fork."
She tells me: "Everybody wanna fuck."
I tell her: "You don't understand? I wanna the fork at the table."
She says: "You better not fuck at the table you son of a bitch!"
So I go back to my room in a hotel and there is no sheets on the bed. Call the manager. I tell him: "I wanna sheet."
He tell me: "To go to the toilet."
I say: "You don't understand? I wanna sheet on a bed."
He says: "You better not shit on my bed you son of a bitch."
I go to the check out and the man at the desk said: "Peace on you!"
I said: "Piss on you too, you son of a bitch."
I'm gonna back to Italia, Arrivederci
The Italian tourist in Malta.
One a day I'm gonna to Malta to big a hotel. In a morning I got down to eat a breakfast. I tell a waitress: "I wanna two pieces of toast."
She brings me only one piece.
I tell her: "I wanna two piece."
She says: "Go to the toilet."
I say: "You don't understand? I wanna two piece in my plate."
She says: "You better no piss in a plate, you son of a bitch!"
I don't even know the lady and she call me son of a bitch.
Later.
I go to eat to a bigger restaurant. The waitress brings me the spoon, the knife but no fork. I tell her: "I wanna the fork."
She tells me: "Everybody wanna fuck."
I tell her: "You don't understand? I wanna the fork at the table."
She says: "You better not fuck at the table you son of a bitch!"
So I go back to my room in a hotel and there is no sheets on the bed. Call the manager. I tell him: "I wanna sheet."
He tell me: "To go to the toilet."
I say: "You don't understand? I wanna sheet on a bed."
He says: "You better not shit on my bed you son of a bitch."
I go to the check out and the man at the desk said: "Peace on you!"
I said: "Piss on you too, you son of a bitch."
I'm gonna back to Italia, Arrivederci
- Points
- 18
Not sure how true this is but I though it quite an amusing read that's why
I'm going to share it with you. lol.
A friend went to Beijing recently and was given this brochure by the hotel. It is precious.
She is keeping it and reading it whenever she feels depressed.
Obviously, it has been translated directly, word for word from Mandarin to English....
Getting There:
Our representative will make you wait at the airport. The bus to the hotel
runs along the lake shore. Soon you will feel pleasure in passing water. You
will know that you are getting near the hotel, because you will go round the
bend. The manager will await you in the entrance hall. He always tries to
have intercourse with all new guests.
The hotel:
This is a family hotel, so children are very welcome. We of course are
always pleased to accept adultery. Highly skilled nurses are available in
the evenings to put down your children. Guests are invited to conjugate in
the bar and expose themselves to others. But please note that ladies are not
allowed to have babies in the bar. We organize social games, so no guest is
ever left alone to play with them self.
The Restaurant:
Our menus have been carefully chosen to be ordinary and unexciting. At
dinner, our quartet will circulate from table to table, and fiddle with you.
Your Room:
Every room has excellent facilities for your private parts. In winter, every
room is on heat. Each room has a balcony offering views of outstanding
obscenity! .. You will not be disturbed by traffic noise, since the road
between the hotel and the lake is used only by pederasts.
Bed
Your bed has been made in accordance with local tradition. If you have any
other ideas please ring for the chambermaid. Please take advantage of her.
She will be very pleased to squash your shirts, blouses and underwear. If
asked, she will also squeeze your trousers.
Above all:
When you leave us at the end of your holiday, you will have no hope. You
will struggle to forget it."
I'm going to share it with you. lol.
A friend went to Beijing recently and was given this brochure by the hotel. It is precious.
She is keeping it and reading it whenever she feels depressed.
Obviously, it has been translated directly, word for word from Mandarin to English....
Getting There:
Our representative will make you wait at the airport. The bus to the hotel
runs along the lake shore. Soon you will feel pleasure in passing water. You
will know that you are getting near the hotel, because you will go round the
bend. The manager will await you in the entrance hall. He always tries to
have intercourse with all new guests.
The hotel:
This is a family hotel, so children are very welcome. We of course are
always pleased to accept adultery. Highly skilled nurses are available in
the evenings to put down your children. Guests are invited to conjugate in
the bar and expose themselves to others. But please note that ladies are not
allowed to have babies in the bar. We organize social games, so no guest is
ever left alone to play with them self.
The Restaurant:
Our menus have been carefully chosen to be ordinary and unexciting. At
dinner, our quartet will circulate from table to table, and fiddle with you.
Your Room:
Every room has excellent facilities for your private parts. In winter, every
room is on heat. Each room has a balcony offering views of outstanding
obscenity! .. You will not be disturbed by traffic noise, since the road
between the hotel and the lake is used only by pederasts.
Bed
Your bed has been made in accordance with local tradition. If you have any
other ideas please ring for the chambermaid. Please take advantage of her.
She will be very pleased to squash your shirts, blouses and underwear. If
asked, she will also squeeze your trousers.
Above all:
When you leave us at the end of your holiday, you will have no hope. You
will struggle to forget it."
Barbosa
Gold Member
- Points
- 0
Ayyyye;- Here one for Thy
SPAGHETTI
For several years, a man was having an affair with an Italian woman.
One night, she confided in him that she was pregnant.
Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he paid her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child.
If she stayed in Italy to raise the child, he would also provide child support until the child turned 18.
She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was born.
To keep it discrete, he told her to simply mail him a post card, and write 'Spaghetti' on the back.
He would then arrange for the child support payments to begin.
One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.
'Honey, 'she said, 'You received a very strange post card today.'
'Oh, just give it to me and I'll explain it later,' he said.
The wife obeyed and watched as her husband read the card, turned white, and fainted.
On the card was written:
'Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti.
Three, with meatballs, two without.
Send extra sauce !!!!!
SPAGHETTI
For several years, a man was having an affair with an Italian woman.
One night, she confided in him that she was pregnant.
Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he paid her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child.
If she stayed in Italy to raise the child, he would also provide child support until the child turned 18.
She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was born.
To keep it discrete, he told her to simply mail him a post card, and write 'Spaghetti' on the back.
He would then arrange for the child support payments to begin.
One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.
'Honey, 'she said, 'You received a very strange post card today.'
'Oh, just give it to me and I'll explain it later,' he said.
The wife obeyed and watched as her husband read the card, turned white, and fainted.
On the card was written:
'Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti.
Three, with meatballs, two without.
Send extra sauce !!!!!